I SOOO want to be that mom and wife. The one that I blog about--who relishes her husband and children, who satisfies her husband's every desires, who can sit and play with her children without thinking of the 74 other things she should be doing. But I'm not her. I'm ME and lately it's been killing me!
Yesterday, Lloyd had to work late so he didn't get home until 7:00. So in my mind I had it all worked out where I would have homework done, the kids bathed, a fabulous supper on the table, etc. Instead, all hell was breaking loose! I had taken all 3 kids to Walmart for the 2nd and LAST time! So by the time I got done, the last thing I wanted to do was cook dinner. And how in the world was that going to happen between the crying baby who's hungry, the cranky 2 year old who's hungry, and the angry, ill-adjusted 5 year old who's hungry? What I did manage was a frozen pizza for the boys, a bottle for Brady, and a very quick bath. We were all cranky by the time Lloyd got home. I just said "I'm sorry!" He of course had no idea what I was talking about! I explained, and he told me that I need "to let go of that." He is perfectly happy with the way I am and understands that I have 3 small children to care for. (I am so thankful for him!) So why is it that I can't grasp that? Why is it that I want to be "Super-Mom?"
I was asking my home-group ladies to pray for me tonight about it. One of them made a comment that it took her 42 years to realize that God made her the way she was and she hoped it didn't take me as long. That really struck me! I was reminded that God created to be this way! I am not super-mom. I can't do it all. My ministry right now is not my toilets or my floors or even a fabulous dinner. My ministry right now is my children and my husband and the youth kids and hopefully a few other people that God places in my path during the day. So who cares if my floors aren't swept every day and my toilet hasn't been cleaned this week? If you do, don't come to my house! :)
So ladies, may we enjoy who we are as individuals! May we never look at each other's blogs and lives with envy (I admit it-I've done it). May we rejoice in the woman that God created us to be!